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Est. 1997 - Proprietors Anthony, Barnett & Massey
Being More Terry Since 1997

Discworld Monthly - Issue 67: November 2002

Table of Contents:

1. Editorial
2. News
3. Readers' Letters
4. Disc Trivia
5. Thud Competition Results
6. Information about Wossname, Nads and the KFL
7. Review: Collectors' Guide to Discworld Figurines from Clarecraft
8. Review: The Fifth Elephant - Live in Adelaide
9. The End

1. Editorial

Welcome to issue 67. SPAM! One of Terry's pet hates has been causing us a few problems lately. I installed a reputable spam filter program on my computer and discovered as I sent out Issue 66 that Yahoo!, who send out Discworld Monthly, are blacklisted on one or more spam blacklists. I think the people maintaining these public blacklists are being a little zealous stopping all mail from the Yahoo! domain, but as with many things on the Internet they are hidden behind anonymous email accounts and not easily traceable. If you are planning to install some Spam Filter software (I had to remove it from my computer as almost 20% of the reader's letters I received whilst the software was installed were being considered spam) please ensure that you include in your software's whitelist. This should ensure that you can still receive Discworld Monthly.

--
Jason Anthony (Editor)
William Barnett (Deputy Editor)
Richard Massey (On Sabbatical)


2. News

Braintree Dramatic Society (Essex) are performing "Lords and Ladies" from 20th-23rd November at the Institute, Bocking End, Braintree at 7.45pm. Advanced booking from Hannay Booksellers, High St Braintree or pay on the door. Tickets 5 GBP (4 GBP Concessions) any further information, phone (01371)820334


Bernard "The Cunning Artificer" Pearson is hosting a Hogswatch Festival in December at Wincanton, Somerset. The two day event takes place on the 7th and 8th December and will include amongst other items the Town Twinning of Wincanton and Ankh-Morpork (where the patrician of Ankh will exchange fraternal greetings with the mayor of Wincanton), free-for-all Thud, painting strange bits, puppet master classes, book signings with Terry Pratchett and a merchants' hall.

A feast will be available at 7pm on Saturday night at the Bear Inn that will consist of locally made sausages (a vegetarian option is available) in rich onion gravy, with mashed potatoes and locally grown greens. There will also be pudding. The cost for this feast will be 8GBP. If you wish to book for food you should contact Bernard or Isobel on 01963-824686.

For more information about this event or Bernard's products visit www.artificer.co.uk


The Purple Theatre Company will be performing Lords and Ladies at the Compass Theatre in Ickenham, West London at 8pm on Wednesday 13 November to Saturday 16 November with a matinee performance at 2.30pm on the Saturday.

Tickets are priced at 5 GBP for the opening night (Wednesday 13 November) and 6.50 GBP (concessions) and 7.50 GBP for all other performances. To book tickets call our box office on 07050 605081

For credit card bookings, call the Compass Theatre box office on 01895 673200. Alternatively, you can book tickets by sending a cheque (made payable to The Purple Theatre Company) and a self-addressed, stamped envelope to :- The Purple Theatre Company, 94 Inwood Road, Hounslow, Middlesex, TW3 1XL

Further information and on-line booking is available via the website www.purpletheatre.org.uk

To support Children in Need on Friday 15th November The Purple Theatre Company are asking people to sponsor a character in their next Pratchett production of Lords and Ladies.

Sponsors of each character will be displayed in the theatre during the run of the play (13th-16th November 2002), will appear in the programme and will be announced before the performance on the night of the Children in Need appeal (15th November 2002). If you can make it to the theatre then you can also get a photograph of yourself with the character that you sponsored. Big deal - but it's free! Sponsor a character for as little as 5GBP. All money goes to Children in Need. If you wish to sponsor a character, please email or call 07050 605081. For programme entries to be made, cheques made out to "BBC Children in Need Appeal" must arrive by post before the 6th November 2002 at

PTC Children in Need Appeal, 94 Inwood Road, Hounslow, Middx, TW3 1XL

Please enclose your name, address and which character you wish to sponsor. We will contact you after the play to tell you how much money Children in Need made through this appeal and to pass on our heartfelt thanks. If you can make it to the play then we will do this in person! For more details and ticket information on Lords and Ladies, check out www.purpletheatre.org.uk


60 Watt Theatre Company present Maskerade on 12-16 November 2002 at The Cottier Theatre, 93 Hyndland Street, Glasgow, UK (www.thecottier.com/)

Tickets cost 9GBP (7GBP concession) Phone 01505-349-168 More information at sixtywatt.co.uk/


A Dutch play-group called 'Boeren als Marjonetten are going to stage Mort. They are an amateur group and have directed the play themselves. They are staging the play at the 6th and the 20th of December at a small theatre called 't Hemeltje in The Netherlands in Wageningen, 5 mei plein 1.

Reservations can be made at telephone number 0317-482600. For more information contact Joyce Mureau at: .


Small Ads....

Please note, DWM has no way of checking the veracity or validity of any of the items in our small ads section. As always, exercise caution when giving out your details over the Internet. We *strongly* recommend parental supervision for younger readers who
follow up any of these contacts.


JazzMC writes: I am looking for someone who has the Soul Music DVD (the cartoon adaptation by the BBC I think, originally), a PC and, if possible, some PC multimedia experience.


Alex has created a new Discworld Forum at pub39.ezboard.com/bsatorsquare


Jeff Cattle writes: I have a UK 1st Edition Hardback copy of Strata for sale...the problem is I don't know how much is it worth! Any readers who have any info on this or want to make a genuine offer please get in touch.


3. Readers' Letters

If you have any letters/comments, please email

We assume any correspondence is eligible for use in the newsletter unless otherwise stated, including the sender's email address. We may also edit your letters and search through your cupboards for snacks.

It is vitally important that you don't pass off other people's work as your own. If you use information from other resources please let us know so we can give proper credit.

This month we have a Clarecraft keyring to give away. Clarecraft have a long history of making models of Discworld Characters. For more information about all Clarecraft products visit their web site at www.clarecraft.co.uk

*
* From: "Helen Ross"
*
I haven't got around to trying this out myself as yet but www.audible.com/ could be a solution [for downloading complete audio books onto a single CD].

Audible supply a downloadable file (of the Isis recording) in your chosen format: particularly of interest are probably MP3 or CD. The images are burnable for Mac or Windows.

DWM replies: According to ISIS Audible don't have their complete back catalogue. The files are digitised versions of the original ISIS recordings and are available in a range of qualities. You do need to have appropriate software on your PC to be able to play them back and they won't work on a normal CD player.


*
* From: "Charlie Ashford"
*
In 'The New Quiz' you said that Detritus was a doorman at the Drum before his current position in the Watch. In fact, his title wasn't doorman but splatter (like a bouncer but trolls use more force). I only remembered this because I happened to have the Discworld Companion in my blazer pocket when I read this during lunch break. Sorry.


*
* From: "Eddie Kiernan"
*
Surely Detritus' last job before joining the Watch was Vice-President in charge of Vice-presidents in Holy Wood.

JA replies: Charlie and Eddie's letters are representative of the many we received pointing out the error of our ways in last month's trivia. William was graceful in defeat and accepts full responsibility for his mistake.


*
* From: "Julia L."
*
The last line of newsletter no. 66 was "Sorry about The Last Hero by the way (sorry.)"

What does this mean?

DWM replies: It was a (humorous) reference to our earlier apology for running a Last Hero spoiler. If you didn't read the SPOILER section you won't have got it, sorry.


*
* From: "Rohan Shenoy"
*
Last month, Robert Marley asked about restoring sound to classic games like Discworld, under Windows XP. Another, possibly simpler alternative to dual-booting is to go to ntvdm.cjb.net/ and download a program called VDM Sound. This provides sound support for DOS boxes and older games, which might have problems with Windows XP. It has brought sound back to many old favourites, including Discworld. I hope this helps, and you can hear Rincewind saying "That doesn't work" again for many more hours on end!

On a similar note, has anyone got Discworld 2 to work under XP? Unfortunately dual-booting is not an option, and I haven't found any other solutions anywhere. Hope someone can help, cos it's a great game.


*
* From: "Phil Fitzsimons"
*
In response to Emily Freeman, I don't want to sound too cocky in any way, but I can read a TP book in a few hours. Longest to date was Fifth elephant, which took about 5 hours. I can also read Lord of the Rings complete in two days and a bit, maybe a little under two if I read until about midnight. But I must admit, I am the only one; most of my friends take weeks and weeks and weeks to read a TP book, but I can read anything at the same pace normally. Bai!

DWM replies: Tsk! It's not a competition. Although WB reckons he can take on all comers if he really pushes himself...


*
* From: "Mike Stevens"
*
I'm replying to Emily Freeman's letter in your issue 66.

I think there are two modes of reading a Pratchett book, at least there are for me.

In mode 1, I'm concentrating on the plot. Since that's pretty gripping I can zip through the book.

In mode 2, I'm trying to spot all the references and allusions. That's a lot harder work and may involve several trips to other bits of the bookshelf/www to check something.

I'd guess that Emily and her brother read in mode 1 (at least first time round), whereas her friend starts in mode 2.

To help define myself in relation to the questions in her penultimate paragraph, I'm within a few days of my 60th birthday, I've been a prolific reader all my life, and I've been reading Pterry's books since the first (UK) paperback editions appeared.


*
* From: "rodney simba"
*
In reply to Emily Freeman's letter last month.

The reading message - well it all depends really on the person and their reading background and how their brain processes things. I find Terry easy to read and generally finish in one day but some books I find very exciting i.e. the Lord of the Rings yet it took me almost 6 months to read all three books yet I know Terry read it in one night (saw that in an interview link posted in DWM a few months ago). Interest levels also play a part but it's not something to worry about the most important point is that the book is read.

There also was a question about playing the old Discworld on XP. Now I dunno about dual booting, I mean this is a Microsoft product and I haven't had much joy in dual booting before, but can't you (when you install the game) set it in Windows 98 compatibility mode? I haven't tried it but I'm sure if you can try that before doing the dual boot thing you may have better luck and less hassles with other things but that's just something I would do (student techie here).


*
* From: "Ben Foster"
*
I always thought that Vetinari formed the Assassins Guild - I'm sure it says that in one of the books- but in Night Watch, Vetinari is a member of it. Was I entirely wrong?

DWM replies: We think that Vetinari was credited with legitimising the guilds, allowing them to be self policing and saving the costs to the city.


*
* From: "J.P. Godfrey"
*
Does anyone know where I can get Discworld posters by mail-order in the UK? I am especially looking for a poster of the picture of DEATH sitting on Binky from page 155 of the hardback edition of The Last Hero.

Also I heard that the pictures have been changed for the paperback edition. I think the cover has a picture of Rincewind instead of Cohen. Why the change, and is there anywhere that I can see the new pictures on-line?


*
* From: "Andrew Moore"
*
I'm a big Discworld fan from the US of A. Don't get me wrong, it's real interesting finding out how you Old Worlders (a.k.a Europeans) are having so much fun. However what about us Yanks? We are lonely and miffed that no Discworld events are happening our way (in particular San Diego, California). I was thinking something simple involving a bar, copious amounts of beer (imported stuff only), maybe some darts or pool and of course something Discworldy to buy, talk about or look at.

I hope I'm whining to the right person and thank you for allowing me to waste precious seconds of your time.


*
* From: "Walz, Markus"
*
A list with all German and English books and short stories is published on our fanclub home page at http://www.pratchett-fanclub.de/terryundco/buecher/index.php?TPF=0b2 2b743832f06d4b293ddb93226d3c1

Colin Smythe told us that they are thinking about a compilation of all short stories. But first they want to publish Night Watch, The Wee Free Men and two other books.


*
* From: "kristin huddleston"
*
I'm a Terry Pratchett ADDICT, I've read ALL the books but have encountered one HUGE problem when trying to feed my addiction - there is NO Terry Pratchett merchandise here in Tasmania Australia, no shirts or cups, no camps or conventions, we are totally deprived. I'm writing to beg the assistance of DWM to help all of us Discworld addicts stranded here in XXXX, we need SOMETHING to do while waiting for the next book and buying stuff online is so risky, not to mention expensive when you consider the crap exchange rates.

DWM replies: Don't TELL anyone there's no merchandise there or you'll be snowed under with the stuff.


*
* From: "Anna Ross"
*

Did you know that two relatives of Great A'Tuin can be found in Barcelona? They're round the back of the Sagrada Familia Cathedral, supporting a couple of pillars on either side of the door. As they're only about a metre in length, I couldn't decide whether they're A'Tuin's descendants, or ancestors. (I did toy briefly with the theory that they might be the great one's forebears, but dismissed it for obvious reasons - well, they're two turtles, aren't they?) (Sorry).

DWM replies: WB had to have the forebears joke explained before he got it. Anna gets LOTM for subtlety.


*
* From: "Rhiannon"
*
Last month Angela Woodgates wrote: I recently tried to buy 'Nanny Ogg's Cokkbook'

Nanny would be proud of that spelling mistake.


*
* From: Paula Suckling
*
Re: Angela Woodgates' frustration with trying to find Nanny Ogg's Cookbook at WH Smiths.

My sympathies to Angela but a word of advice to her and anyone searching for PTerry books.....GO TO OTTAKARS! Any Ottakars book store I have visited has been staffed by knowledgeable, helpful people who CAN actually spell and HAVE actually heard of Pratchett because they stock all of his books (that includes maps, the cookbook and anything else related to him).


*
* From: "Douglas G. Vance"
*
Two years ago, a high school student qualified for the National Forensic League tournament in Oklahoma in the category of "Humorous Interpretation" using Carpe Jugulum. The piece has to be 10 minutes or less and you can't move out of a two square foot area. If you are interested I could find out where the student is from. We have a listing of all the qualifying pieces. (Nationals like the "SuperBowl" football (not soccer) game in the US).

DWM replies: We didn't understand this, but we thought other readers might enjoy it.


*
* From: "Brigitte Like"
*
I am an Englishman living in Germany, and as a PTerry fan for many years I have all his books both in English and German. So in reply to Avatar's question here are the titles in English and German (Published Books) The Colour of Magic - Die Farben der Magie, The Light Fantastic - Das Licht der Phatasie, Equal Rights - Das Erbe des Zauberers, Mort - Gevatter Tod, Sourcery - Der Zauberhut, Wyrd Sisters - Macbest, Pyramids - Pyramiden, Guards,Guards - Wachen,Wachen, Eric - Eric, Moving Pictures - Voll im Bilde, Reaper Man - Alles Sense, Witches Abroad - Total Verhext, Small Gods - Einfach Goettlich, Lords and Ladies - Lords und Ladies, Men at Arms - Helle Barden, Soul Music - Rollende Steine, Interesting Times - Echt Zauberhaft, Maskerade - Mummenschanz, Feet of Clay - Hohle Koepfe, Hogfather - Schweinsgalopp, Jingo - Fliegende Fetzen, The Last Continent - Heisse Huepfer, Carpe Jugulum - Ruhig Blut, The Fifth Elephant - Der Fuenfte Elefant, The Truth - Der Volle Wahrheit, The Thief of Time - Der Zeitdieb, The Last Hero - Wahre Helden, Hope this has been helpful.

DWM replies: Our rudimentary knowledge of German leads us to believe several of these are not literal translations. Any offers as to what they mean? E.g. Total Verhext, Fliegende Fetzen.


*
* From: "Joel Brackenbury"
*
I think I ought to make an official apology to everyone for giving away the ending of The Last Hero in issue 65, which understandably upset quite a few people. In my infinite lack of wisdom, it completely failed to occur to me that anyone might not have read it yet.

Sorry folks. Won't do it again. Promise.


*
* From: "Anthony Smith"
*
A friend has the following discworld memorabilia and was wondering what it is worth for insurance purposes.

A cardboard box made to look like the luggage, inside a paperback of the "Light Fantastic" (first edition?) and a coffee mug.

Any suggestions on price please let me know.

Also:

W H Smith's Book Case magazine issue 45 with the short story Theatre of Cruelty, signed by Terry.


4. Disc Trivia

William "Mr Trivia" Barnett is back with some more brain teasers for
you. Starting this month, he'll be asking one question per book, in chronological order, until he runs out of books.

Q1.
Who is Ninereeds? (TCOM)

Q2.
What is the forest of Skund known as in the local language? (TLF)

Q3.
What is Malich the Wise remembered for? (ER)

Q4.
What excuse for getting off work is not available to Mort? (Mort)

Q5.
What unsuitable career path did Nijel the Destroyer opt for? (Sourcery)

As always the answers can be found at the end of this issue.


5. Thud Competition Results

Last month Bernard Pearson asked you to name the geographical location for the historic setting of Thud. The answer was of couse Koom Valley. We had hundreds of entries (nearly all of which were correct) and the randomly selected winner of one of the new game sets was Mark Cummins. Your prize should soon be on its way.

Remember to keep pestering the managers of Ottakars, Borders, Hammicks, Forbidden Planet & Waterstones to find out when they will be stocking the game.

For more information about Thud visit the official web site at www.thudgame.com and for more information about Bernard visit www.artificer.co.uk


6. Information about Wossname, Nads and the KFL

by Joe Schaumburger

Just got and read the latest DWM, and was distressed to see so much confusion about WOSSNAME and the KFL.

By way of clarification:

1. Requests to subscribe to WOSSNAME should be sent to me, Joe Schaumburger, at:

This will also make you a member of the North American Discworld Society and the Klatchian Foreign Legion. It's all free, and I am head of all of them. WOSSNAME has a circulation of about 1,500. Going to the website you listed: discworld.imaginary.com/DiscworldSociety/wossname/ will take you to an old web page, which we can't change since the webmaster has disappeared, and which is filled with inaccurate information. [Maybe he joined the KFL and forgot about it? - Ed]

2. The Spanish newsletter is published by Manuel Viciano, the head of the Spanish section of the KFL, and has a circulation of about 360, mostly in Spain, Mexico, Central America and South America.. We regularly run translated material from it in WOSSNAME. To subscribe directly, and to join the Spanish branch of the KFL, write to

3. We are gradually expanding the activities of the KFL with Meets in the UK and Australia, a Spanish DW Worldcon in Madrid last month and a meeting of the Seamstress Guild of Ankh Morpork (California Chapter) at Discworld Fan Party on Friday, August 30th at the World Science Fiction and Fantasy Convention in San Jose, California (U.S.A.).

4. We also helped to publicize a production of MORT in Chicago in April by Push & Shove Inc., at Breadline Theatre. This was not covered at all by DWM, alas.

Joe Schaumburger
Editor, WOSSNAME
World Coordinator, KFL
Continental Coordinator, NADS


7. Review: Collectors' Guide to Discworld Figurines from Clarecraft

The Collectors' Guide to Discworld Figurines from Clarecraft [guide from now on] was written by Trish Baker (owner of Clarecraft and avid collector herself) as a guide for collectors of Clarecraft Figurines. The guide comes in an A5 loose leaf folder, for easy updating as new pages are released.

The guide starts with a brief but interesting history of the company from the early Bernard Pearson days, when they first contacted Terry to see if they could make figurines of his characters, right up to use of Pewter Hallmarks to identify original Clarecraft models.

Section one talks about the individual figurines, giving details of each version made, when they were retired, how many were sold, what they originally cost and how much they have exchanged hands for since retirement. If there is something special to look for on a figurine (to find the most valuable version) it will be listed here.

Historically figurines have been modified when Clarecraft discovered problems such as bits breaking in the moulds, difficulties in removing the fettle seams and complaints from the painters.

The next section includes Collectors Editions, for example DW102 Angua as a Wolf, and follows a similar format to the previous section.

The section on Oddities and 'Cock Ups' is interesting as it shows Clarecraft can make mistakes as much as anyone - even with Terry's amazing attention to detail. When DW100 Captain Carrot and DW102 Angua as a Wolf were originally released they were given the same badge number as the previous Vimes figurine. An eagle-eyed collector informed Clarecraft and the figurines were revised to include new badge numbers. If you have a 177-badged version of either of these figurines keep them as they are a lot more valuable.

Other sections include information on Special Event Pieces, Freebies & Special Event Offers, Coats of Arms and Artefacts (including the infamous Holy Anorak).

The guide also includes a list of all Clarecraft Discworld pieces with check boxes next to them so you can tick off which ones you already have and also includes the latest catalogue.

The guide finishes with a small form that allows you to register your interest in finding out when new loose leaf pages will be released.

For the avid collector this guide will be extremely useful. For the casual collector (like myself) I found it very interesting. My only concern is that it appears to be quite incomplete with many figurines missing. Upon contacting Clarecraft I discovered they are only including retired pieces or pieces that had multiple versions, some of which were particularly valuable. As more pieces are retired periodic updates will be made available ensuring this guide will become extremely useful over the years.

For more information about Clarecraft, this guide and their wonderful figurines visit www.clarecraft.co.uk


8. Review: The Fifth Elephant - Live in Adelaide

by Rod Lewis

Commander Sir Samuel Vimes of the City Watch (played wonderfully by George Leaman) is assigned to the town of Uberwald as an ambassador for the inauguration of the Low King. He is accompanied by fellow City Watch police officers Sergeant Detritus (a troll), Corporal Cheery Littlebottom (a modern-thinking dwarf), and assassin-come-political adviser Inigo Skimmer.

Nick Hargreaves threatens to steal the show as dumb Detritus while Sally Fudge playing Cheery has the makings of a very funny character if she takes it a little more over the top. Unseen stalwart Sam Priestly reprises his role of the height-enhanced dwarf Captain Carrot, once again making it his own.

Melanie Munt is a star as always, this time playing a sexy, savage werewolf and Roger Priess, playing her brother, is equally superb as the deadly beast Wolfgang. As vampire Lady Margolotta, Danielle Seal lacks projection, a problem also afflicting Nicole Seal playing Lady Sybil Vimes.

Directors Pamela Munt and Damien White keep the action flowing fast and frantic although snappier line delivery by the cast would aid the cause.

The use of various melodies to accentuate action or bridge the pauses between scene changes are deliciously tongue-in-cheek, including Bad Moon Rising and Heigh-Ho! from Disney's Snow White.

There is a disappointing lack of attention to detail however, such as traditional dwarf Dee wearing nail polish and the werewolf Baroness decorated with a silver headpiece and jewellery and the cast upstage themselves and each other too much by walking behind people when talking, looking upstage too much and, in the case of The Patrician, holding the tall staff in his downstage hand, thus hiding his face. But with a bit of thought the problems are all easily rectified by the more experienced performers and will hopefully disappear as the season progresses.

Problems aside, fans of Pratchett plays should get a good laugh out of Unseen's latest offering, their best so far.

From: The Adelaide Theatre Guide theatreguide.tripod.com/htm_events/reviews.htm#fifth

The Fifth Elephant, Unseen Theatre Company, www.unseen.com.au

Bakehouse Theatre, 255 Angas Street, Adelaide, South Australia October 11 - 26, 2002


9. The End

* Contact Information *

We prefer information to be sent via email, but can accept information via fax or post at the following addresses:

Email:
Fax: 0118-977-2158
Post: J Anthony (DWM), 86 Bruce Road, Woodley, Berkshire, RG5 3DZ

* Latest Book Information *

The latest Discworld book released in paperback was Thief of Time 0552148407/87 and the last hardbacks were The Last Hero (with illustrations by Paul Kidby). 057506885X/87 and The Amazing Maurice and his Educated Rodents 0385601239/87

Terry's latest children's book is The Amazing Maurice and his Educated Rodents 0385601239/87 and his latest collaboration is The Science of Discworld II: The Globe 0091882737/87

The next Discworld novel due for release in November 2002 will be called Night Watch and will star Sam Vimes. 0385602642/87

* Subscription Information *

To subscribe to 'Discworld Monthly' simply enter your email address in the form on the 'Discworld Monthly' web page. Our web site contains all back issues and links to other Pratchett sites.

discworldmonthly.co.uk/

Current circulation approximately 21000

To unsubscribe simply send an empty email from the account you subscribed under to

If you have any problems unsubscribing visit our removal help page at: discworldmonthly.co.uk/remove.php

* Trivia Results *

Q1.
Who is Ninereeds? (TCOM)
A1.
Twoflower's dragon

Q2.
What is the forest of Skund known as in the local language? (TLF)
A2.
Your finger you fool

Q3.
What is Malich the Wise remembered for? (ER)
A3.
He founded Unseen University

Q4.
What excuse for getting off work is not available to Mort? (Mort)
A4.
His grandmother's funeral

Q5.
What unsuitable career path did Nijel the Destroyer opt for? (Sourcery)
A5.
Barbarian Hero

* Obtaining Terry's Books *

If you are looking for Terry books or videos over the net, simply visit our web page at discworldmonthly.co.uk/ and follow the 'Purchasing' link on the left panel of the page.

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Thanks for reading this issue of 'Discworld Monthly'. We hope you enjoyed it. If you have any comments or suggestions for the future of this newsletter please email: